NEW YEAR, NEW ME DOESN’T WORK !!!!
So now I have your attention…. Let’s expand on this…
This time of year, thousands of people decide that they will change their habits in a positive way …
Be that starting to eat healthier, lose weight, start exercising, cut down alcohol or reach out to the person they have lost contact with …
And whilst at first impression this might seem like the perfect time of year to do so, after a short period of time this good intention may have waned or indeed disappeared altogether!
So let’s look at the reasons why this occurs and maybe offer some alternatives to keep you on track toward better habits, whatever they may be in 2023 …..
When you look at the science and literature pertaining to human behaviour some similar trends explain why humans find it quite challenging to change behaviours and tend to ‘regress to the norm’. At a brain level we are designed to find the easiest and most convenient solutions to challenges and problems so our brain will do anything it can to reduce friction and avoid barriers to change to find an efficient solution. What the literature suggests is that when we have well defined behavioural patterns our brain tends to super-insulate these pathways at brain level making them easier to recognise and execute. So, think about that for a second because you can probably recognise several examples of this both positive and negative. A positive example might be having a protein shake after each gym workout to assist regeneration and recovery. Whilst a negative example might be using alcohol to cope with a stressful situation. Both are related to behavioural patterns and after a while they become associated behaviours well defined at brain level.
So, if we want to make positive changes where do we start?
Well, let’s get the big rock out of the way first!!!! CONSISTENCY ……
The reason why people often find themselves making New Year’s resolutions is because their consistency making good choices throughout the weeks of last year has been, well, INCONSISTENT. For example, if you have gained weight this year it’s relatively simple. You have CONSISTENTLY over-consumed calories. If you want to lose weight you need to CONSISTENTLY be in a slight calorie deficit by manipulating nutrition, burning more calories or both. People make this far to complicated or make various excuses. It really is quite simple in most cases.
Let’s expand on this point because it is so important and often explains why people don’t achieve goals whatever they may be. Setting good habits and remain consistent with them is challenging and often boring for some but it is the solid foundations upon which behaviour change house is built! Without consistency habit alteration is likely to be successful only in the short term and ultimately fail.
So, how do we achieve consistency ???
Well start TINY. BJ Fogg’s excellent book ‘Tiny Habits’ and James Clear’s ‘Atomic Habits’ clearly outline that most will fail if they set goals too large. I’m sure you have heard the analogy of ‘How to eat an elephant’ – cut it up into small pieces! The literature suggests that if we set small goals and positively encourage ourselves when we achieve them this is an important step in the process of habit formation. By making things tiny we make them more realistically achievable.
We also need to REDUCE FRICTION. So, by this I mean reduce and mitigate barriers to change. Make habit change easy and enjoyable. For example, rather than cutting out a problematic food group (such as crisps or chocolate) try reducing them. Go for reduced portion sizes or lower fat options. Try low/no alcohol lager rather than stopping drinking altogether.
You also need to create an ENVIRONMENT FOR CHANGE. Put yourself in a position that makes forming new habits as easy as possible. Examples of this might be making sure your gym is within 15 mins of work or home to make hitting your sessions as easy as possible. Or try packing your gym bag the night before so you aren’t rushing around early in the morning and either forget something or miss your session completely. Have a 2-litre water bottle on your desk at work, it is then easy to achieve your goal of adequate hydration rather than having to walk to the kitchen for water. With regard to nutrition, it is often easier to achieve your goals if you and your partner or whole family are eating the same, healthy meals. And one of the best things to do is FOOD PREP! Spend 60 mins once per week batch cooking/preparing food for the week as this allows you to be consistent with nutrition and you can also ensure you eat a balanced diet through the week.
Both of these habits help us to keep our MOTIVATION MONKEY happy. BJ Fogg outlines the ‘Motivation Monkey’ in his book as the analogy of an excitable, well intentioned primate that is full of good intentions to form new habits and create new behaviours only for that intense motivation for change to wane over time toward a diluted version of our initial vision. Think about examples of that for a second…. The January gym newbie who by spring no longer attends. The well intentioned christmas puppy owner who struggles to find the motivation to walk the dog in the depths of the english winter. The well intentioned tea-totaller who attends their first social event and finds themselves succumb to a sneaky pint or 2 … We really have to work hard to be consisten and the eaier we can make this the better …
Another very useful approach is to remove clutter and aim to become an Essentialist. In his excellent book ‘Essentialism’ Greg McKeown discusses various issues that people have by saying yes to too many people and essentially over-burdening themselves with options. This then results in people feeling like they are on the proverbial hamster’s wheel, constantly running like crazy yet achieving very little. If we take some of these principles and apply them to habit change, they can be very useful! As Stephen R Covey popularised in his book ‘7 habits of highly effective people‘, work our what your key priorities, non-negotiables or Big Rocks are, make them a priority and address them first before committing time to other things. In doing this you have a ripple effect that catalyses change in many other parts of your life.
By really focusing on what is important to us we free up time and we can focus better on key things that matter most and have the time to execute them fully and achieve our goals. For example, by trying to cram way too much into each day we spread ourselves very thinly and this results in us rushing things that really matter or not doing them at all. Go back to our examples of food preparation, specific times to hit the gym and packing our bag the evening before our exercise session. If we are over-burdened with non-essential tasks and we are likely to rush or miss the gym session, skip food prep and grab nutrition which might not be the best whilst all the time feeling over-whelmed with things to do thereby increasing friction to change and resistance to new habit formation.
Finally, when you are aiming to set new habits recognise you don’t have to live like a monk 100% of the time. It’s like standing at the bottom of base camp at Everest looking up and thinking how is it possible to climb THAT! A good rule of thumb is the 90/10 approach. By this if you are getting things right (gym attendance, nutrition, hydration, sleep) 90% of the time don’t sweat about the other 10%. The odd meal you enjoy, piece (not whole bar) or chocolate, beer (1/2 not 10) or glass of wine (not bottle) won’t de-rail you from achieving your goals in the long term. People get very focused on setting weekly targets and sometimes this is too short a period of time when we know most of the literature suggest periods of up to 90 days to set new habits which stick.
So, I hope this article has been useful …… And that the keys message coming across is that you have to set a well-chosen destination but the stick with this CONSISTENTLY over TIME … If you do this then you will achieve your goals and most importantly change your behaviour and form new and healthy habits
Happy new year and thank you for all your support in 2022. I look forward to providing you with more useful blogs and vlogs in 2023
